Our journey

Saturday, May 30, 2009

Sisterly Lullaby & Pics

Trip to the consulate for Eden's passport

Saturday, May 09, 2009

Eden Faith Wolf

Praise the Lord, He allowed it to go just as I'd hoped...and better!

I was scheduled to go to the hospital yesterday morning at 9:00 to be induced. However, yesterday at 3:00 AM, I started having contractions. They were initially about 10 minutes apart and I timed them for about an hour to make sure it was going to keep going before I woke Ryan up. Poor guy, got a sinus infection and hasn't been feeling very good. I woke him up at 4 AM and he immediately went to work...turned on soft music, dimmed the lights, and prayed for me or read scripture while I breathed through each contraction. I remember telling him that these contractions weren't building up at all. Rather, they seemed to hit me at the peak then gradually eased off.

Around 5 AM, my water broke and the contractions jumped from about 8 minutes apart to 4 or 5 minutes apart. I told Ryan we should head to the hospital, but he said he thought we should wait a little longer. When the next contraction hit a couple of minutes later, I told him we were going to the hospital and he obliged. We woke my parents up to give them the news as we rushed out the door. Of course, I had another contraction while we waited for the elevator to come to our floor, just before getting in the car and several on the way. In fact, I started being able to feel the sensation to push as we were driving to the hospital. We left the house at 5:20 AM and arrived at the hospital at 5:40.

When we walked into the emergency room, the nurse walked up to us casually and said something like, "How can I help you?" Ryan thought he wouldn't have to explain what was going on, being that I was doing the breathing exercises and such, but politely responded by telling him that I as in labor. He wheeled me to the maternity ward.

The nurse on duty immediately hooked me up to the fetal monitor and told Ryan she'd call my doctor after 15 minutes of monitoring the baby and contractions. I honestly thought she'd realize that my contractions were literally 3 minutes apart and call the doctor. But she didn't. There was probably some language issues involved--mostly on our end. :) I was able to endure about 10 minutes of this on the bed; all the while Ryan repeatedly asked if I could get off of the bed because I was in a lot of pain. She kept telling him to wait for her test to be finished. Then it occurred to me that I should tell her about this increasingly strong urge to push--that ought to make her take this more seriously! At this point, she hadn't even done an internal exam to check my progress. As soon as she heard that I wanted to push, she did an exam and immediately paged the doctor on call.

The doctor on call came in and told us the baby would be out in 5 or 10 minutes. I really needed to hear that because I was laying there telling Ryan I couldn't do it anymore...it hurt too bad! I was trying so hard not to push because no one had told me to push yet, but it was like my bodily did it involuntarily. Fortunately, the nurses and doctor were able to get everything ready just as I had to push the first time. Ryan was so encouraging, praying for me through each contraction and telling me what a wonderful job I was doing. I was sweating, crying and regretting having no pain medication. At some point during all of this I told Ryan that next time I would be getting pain medication. That's what every woman probably thinks at this point.

After that first push, Ryan told me that I probably only needed to push one more time, and he was right--out came our precious Eden Faith. She was born at 6:22 AM on May 8, 2009. She weighed 4.21 kg (about 9 lbs 3 oz), 51 cm long (about 20 inches) and has light brown hair. Honestly, we couldn't decide on a name for another couple of hours...it's an important decision. I chose Faith for her middle name because this pregnancy and delivery have taken me on a spiritual journey, drawing me closer to my Father and really testing my faith. And my journey doesn't end here. I keep looking to Him as I am overwhelmed at the thought of raising 2 girls and teaching them about the God of the universe. I am reassured knowing Him, who is faithful and that He is able to do more than I can ask or imagine. I rest in His promises to give me everything I need to do that which He has asked of me (and to protect my kids when I mess up).

All in all, I think we did pretty well communicating in the language while in this tense situation...well, Ryan did really well. After trying to communicate a few times in the midst of the contractions, I changed to giving orders to Ryan to tell the doctor or nurse. Other interesting parts of the story were that the nurse was trying to fill out paper work as I was really close to pushing. She kept asking us questions and for my i.d., etc. After the initial check on Eden, the nurse allowed me to hold her for a few minutes. I didn't know why Ryan left the room at the same time, but it turns out that they had asked him to step into the hall and pay the bill. Can you believe that? He was irritated when, while he was paying, they wheeled Eden by to get her full examination in the nursery. He asked if they could wait and let him hold her for a few minutes and they wouldn't let him. The hospital was beautiful and the nurses and doctors were extremely professional and helpful. I think I rate the experience as highly as I rated my first birth experience--but that time I had two really great friends that were also Selah's baby nurses.

Selah loves her little sister and is very excited about changing poopy diapers, bringing toys, and holding her. She keeps saying (in a really high-pitched voice), "Eden is an iddy bitty tiny baby!" We are very thankful for all the help that grammy and pops are providing!

Here are few pics. You can see more here.

Dr. Deniz and the girls

Ready to hit the road

Buckle up for safety

In front of the horse pistol

Here's Selah loving on her "Little, itty-bitty, tiny baby"

Tuesday, May 05, 2009


Last night I realized that though I feel a Spirit-led leading to wait for the baby to come naturally, I may not see that reality. I feel a complete peace about being induced on Friday, if the baby hasn't come by then--and will proceed in that plan.

The verses on the men in the hall of faith in Hebrews 11 have come to mind--the men were faithful but never received that which was promised.

Verse 13 "All these men died in faith, without receiving the promises, but having seen them and having welcomed them from a distance, and having confessed that they were strangers and exiles on the earth."

Though I still have until Friday before the scheduled induction, I need to be okay with waiting, and the possibility of not getting what I am hoping for. The past week has been quite a spiritual struggle for me as I wake up every morning disappointed and frustrated. I want this baby to come--like a week ago--because I'm tired of carrying her, my parents are here waiting too, I want to be able to get on the floor and play with Selah again, and I just want to hold this little girl in my arms. I have been blessed to have lots of friends calling regularly to let me know they are praying for me as I struggle through the waiting. And I know God is refining me in the waiting. So, maybe the goal in all this is for me to trust and obey, when it is very difficult to do so.

I know this might seem to many (and even to me in a few months) to be such a small struggle that I'm blowing up into a big one. I mean, its really just waiting for 2 weeks longer than the supposed due date. But, I've struggled through many emotions, fears, and thoughts over the past weeks and months. I've heard lots of advice and had to trust God in many moments of fear, etc. Regardless of whether this is actually a big or small issue now or later, I do know that I've been weak and left with nothing but my faith and trust in the Lord. Praise Him for that. I do hope that my selfishness has not hindered His glory in and through my life.

Sunday, May 03, 2009

Like Father Like Daughter

Yesterday, my parents brought Selah a new pair of shoes. She thinks they are pretty cool. The funniest part of the whole afternoon for me was watching her try the shoes on. After she put them on, she stood up and did a little dance. It was sooooo similar to a little dance that Ryan sometimes does when he puts his shoes on...and I don't think he has done it for Selah yet, so it must have just come naturally to her. Her personality is very similar to Ryan's--and I love it!!

Still cozy.....

The baby is still cozy. I, on the other hand, am feeling....I'll let you fill in the blank.
41 weeks, 2 days

We had an appointment with Dr. Deniz on Thursday; she's a big fan of Selah. Selah was working on drawing a picture for her when we took this picture.

Grammy and Pops arrived yesterday afternoon with much ado. They brought lots of treats and smiles! Selah was very excited and so were we. Now, everyone is here, waiting on the baby to come!

We've had a good time over the past week playing Wii and entertaining ourselves as we wait. Last night, every time I "threw" a bowling ball I cramped up somewhere. We were hoping my birth story could include the "Wii natural induction method", but it couldn't finish the job.

If there is no baby by Friday morning, we think we'll be more than happy to bring her out via induction. We'll see....